Dearest Heather I have been unable to sleep I am so filled with emotion and love for you I had no idea that you saw me so clearly or loved me so dearly I remember vividly the day that you were born I was so incredibly happy filled with joy I remember kissing your soft sweet little face having a daughter meant so much to me on a deep level I believe that it was the reason I got married mainly so I could have children and I always wanted to have daughters and so I was blessed four times over I had one to have six children but that was not to be I still feel that there are several Souls out there that were meant to be mine however I do think I added some strength and clarity to some others I've met in this world I was very very happy to give birth to Tara providing you with a sister everyone needs one my sister died when she was 57 and I still feel the loss of what we did not have time to create between us I thought of my mother today I don't think of her as often as I used to I know that I inherited strength from her and I'm grateful for that I thought a lot today and I'm still thinking about it which is to my lack of ability to sleep or some of the things that I wish I had created in my life I feel I still have time even if it is a day I will see you in the morning peace and prosperity as always
Wonderful letter and memories! My parents too tried TM (even thought I’d already begun studying Zen). Mom died when I was 25. I love the metaphor of Indra’s net, and the truth of impermanence. 🙏
Thanks Don! I realize that I'm quite fortunate that my Mother has made it this far. Since we children inherit our mother's mitochondrial DNA, it might be that I live a long life too. You never know. Impermanence makes life bittersweet. Bowing.
What a rich, beautiful letter! I am amazed at your elegant interweaving of the Dharma and the love you have for your mother/her love for you. Gorgeous!
Thank you for commenting and reading. I think my love for the Dharma is only superseded by the love for my Mother. Of course, not-one, not-two. Bowing.
I came to this piece having seen your comment on Erin’s most recent entry, marking the first anniversary of losing Dave. It has been an extraordinary gift to read her 13 years after losing my own partner to suicide. And that has led me to you at this moment, as I contemplate my daughter, the depth and beautiful complexity of our love for one another, forged through joy and profound pain. Thank you for the rich texture your letter brought me today.
Hi Shannon, I'm so sorry to hear that your partner committed suicide. Erin's honest sharing about her grief is so helpful for many of us. IMHExperience, grief and anger are the two main pariah emotions in our society. Which means, when we express them we're often shamed. My grandfather committed suicide when my father was 8 years old. A whole lotta shame for him and his siblings to endure as Italian Roman Catholics. The more we have the courage to express these difficult emotions, I hope the more people will come to understand that emotional energy is not transformed UNLESS it bubbles or roars to the surface of consciousness. Practicing Zen has helped me meet these bubbles and roars with non-judgmental awareness so they can be seen for what they are: impermanent, not who I am, and a source of suffering if I believe that I am this passing phenomena.
And, thank you so much for reading my post about my mother! She's always been and will always remain my biggest champion.📿🦄
Hi Steve, thank you for reading and commenting. It's always appreciated when people comment or "like" the post so I know it's not just sitting out there in the ether collecting space dust 💫📿
Heather More, this brought tears to my eyes. What a wonderful testament to motherhood and the mysterious, deep, incalculable synergy of Mother/Daughter. You have a kick-ass mom and I loved hearing about her and about you and how your have supported and sustained one another. Thanks, as always, for your clarity, humor, and wisdom. Let's have More Heather!
Aww, thanks Laura for your sweet comment! There were so many more things I could have written, but alas there's only so much time and we had my niece's pool party to go to! Bowing from LA.
Dearest Heather I have been unable to sleep I am so filled with emotion and love for you I had no idea that you saw me so clearly or loved me so dearly I remember vividly the day that you were born I was so incredibly happy filled with joy I remember kissing your soft sweet little face having a daughter meant so much to me on a deep level I believe that it was the reason I got married mainly so I could have children and I always wanted to have daughters and so I was blessed four times over I had one to have six children but that was not to be I still feel that there are several Souls out there that were meant to be mine however I do think I added some strength and clarity to some others I've met in this world I was very very happy to give birth to Tara providing you with a sister everyone needs one my sister died when she was 57 and I still feel the loss of what we did not have time to create between us I thought of my mother today I don't think of her as often as I used to I know that I inherited strength from her and I'm grateful for that I thought a lot today and I'm still thinking about it which is to my lack of ability to sleep or some of the things that I wish I had created in my life I feel I still have time even if it is a day I will see you in the morning peace and prosperity as always
Wonderful letter and memories! My parents too tried TM (even thought I’d already begun studying Zen). Mom died when I was 25. I love the metaphor of Indra’s net, and the truth of impermanence. 🙏
Thanks Don! I realize that I'm quite fortunate that my Mother has made it this far. Since we children inherit our mother's mitochondrial DNA, it might be that I live a long life too. You never know. Impermanence makes life bittersweet. Bowing.
So good you get to tell her now while she is with you, is here. She sounds so open.
Thank you for reading, Lyn. I missed the opportunity to tell my father while he was alive but didn't want to miss this opportunity. Peace!
What a rich, beautiful letter! I am amazed at your elegant interweaving of the Dharma and the love you have for your mother/her love for you. Gorgeous!
Thank you for commenting and reading. I think my love for the Dharma is only superseded by the love for my Mother. Of course, not-one, not-two. Bowing.
Lovely letter! Your mom sounds like a great person to have in your life.
She is. And I hope that she gets around to reading this without my having to mention it!
I came to this piece having seen your comment on Erin’s most recent entry, marking the first anniversary of losing Dave. It has been an extraordinary gift to read her 13 years after losing my own partner to suicide. And that has led me to you at this moment, as I contemplate my daughter, the depth and beautiful complexity of our love for one another, forged through joy and profound pain. Thank you for the rich texture your letter brought me today.
Hi Shannon, I'm so sorry to hear that your partner committed suicide. Erin's honest sharing about her grief is so helpful for many of us. IMHExperience, grief and anger are the two main pariah emotions in our society. Which means, when we express them we're often shamed. My grandfather committed suicide when my father was 8 years old. A whole lotta shame for him and his siblings to endure as Italian Roman Catholics. The more we have the courage to express these difficult emotions, I hope the more people will come to understand that emotional energy is not transformed UNLESS it bubbles or roars to the surface of consciousness. Practicing Zen has helped me meet these bubbles and roars with non-judgmental awareness so they can be seen for what they are: impermanent, not who I am, and a source of suffering if I believe that I am this passing phenomena.
And, thank you so much for reading my post about my mother! She's always been and will always remain my biggest champion.📿🦄
Fantastic as always, thank you.
Hi Steve, thank you for reading and commenting. It's always appreciated when people comment or "like" the post so I know it's not just sitting out there in the ether collecting space dust 💫📿
What a precious gift to your mom. Thanks for sharing this.
Heather More, this brought tears to my eyes. What a wonderful testament to motherhood and the mysterious, deep, incalculable synergy of Mother/Daughter. You have a kick-ass mom and I loved hearing about her and about you and how your have supported and sustained one another. Thanks, as always, for your clarity, humor, and wisdom. Let's have More Heather!
Aww, thanks Laura for your sweet comment! There were so many more things I could have written, but alas there's only so much time and we had my niece's pool party to go to! Bowing from LA.
Hi Baz, thanks for thanking my Mom. I hope she reads it today!